


Step By Step

by lyriumspectrify



Category: Neon Genesis Evangelion
Genre: Alternate Universe - Ballet, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-04-08
Updated: 2014-04-08
Packaged: 2018-01-18 14:45:27
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,636
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1432345
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lyriumspectrify/pseuds/lyriumspectrify
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>One-shot fic, a prompt given by Kawosinner.</p>
<p>Shinji usually passes his time in the ballet school as a simple escape from having to deal with his home life with his father. But when a boy named Kaworu joins in the group, he is unsure of how to react to the first welcoming presence in his life that can see a potential in him that he never knew of.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Step By Step

Shinji will always remember the first day Kaworu joined the dance school.

When the instructor introduced him to the group, there were mixed reactions. Some people groaned, annoyed with the idea of having someone new and thus someone that has to play catch up, while others were rather disinterested. Another new face was nothing; people frequently would try to join up but falter under the pressure and leave later. But Shinji stared, unsure of what to think of this newcomer.

He was all slender limbs and carefree smiles, possessing eyelashes that swept in a way that made his eyes almost appear catlike. His eyes contrasted his gentle posture with their focused intensity, and when Shinji was wondering silently about the brilliant crimson in Kaworu's eyes it was only then he realized the boy was staring right back at him.

Smiling, always smiling.

Shinji choked on his embarrassment, trying to look at his reflection in the studio theater to avoid further contact. Even still, he knew Kaworu was smiling at him with a gentleness that matched his slender frame.

“...Please take care of him and make sure he knows exactly what we’re working on, got it?” their instructor asked, to which everyone in the class either nodded softly or in one person’s case, groaned rather loudly; which earned a frown from the instructor. The one making her annoyance clear, Asuka, was never fond of newcomers.

“...Alright then, back to work!”

After the soft rustling of trained feet picked up again, their instructor returned her attention to Kaworu, seemingly giving him a few last minute directions. Shinji didn’t hear what was said exactly, and he was fighting to stare at his reflection with such resolve that he nearly forgot to breathe as he focused on his technique. He hated how red his face was looking, still caught up in embarrassment of staring at Kaworu.

“...Ikari, come here for a second?” the teacher suddenly called out, gesturing towards the boy. He felt his heart jump up into his throat and his face heated up again.

Oh lord…

Shinji obediently stops his warmups and walks cautiously over, increasingly aware of Kaworu’s curious gaze over him. Their instructor claps her hands on their shoulders, turning Shinji in such a way that he had to face the other. He could feel his face heat to the point he knew he had to look like a tomato…

He didn’t dare make eye contact, even though he could feel Kaworu trying to make that connection.

“I want you to work with Nagisa. Get him caught up on what we’re doing here. He already has previous experience in Germany so he shouldn’t cause you any issues,” the teacher instructed with a pleasant smile, before releasing them and returning to examining her other students to correct any mistakes.

“Ikari Shinji, is it?” Kaworu finally spoke, and the smooth tone of the boy’s voice shocked Shinji. For such a small person, his voice was deeper than he would have expected.

“Y-yeah,” Shinji answered, daring a glance to finally make eye contact. There honestly was no avoiding it now, especially since they were paired to be together.

Sure enough, Kaworu had no issues with making eye contact, and upon finally meeting (somewhat) properly, his relaxed smile grew the slightest. “I’m Kaworu. Nagisa Kaworu. It’s a pleasure to meet you,” he said, offering his hand.

Shinji hesitated, but finally held out his own hand to shake Kaworu’s, clasping his hand firmly before Kaworu tugged him the slightest bit closer.

Poor Shinji thought his heart was going to explode.

Kaworu, instead of shaking his hand, gently pulled Shinji’s hand up to his face,  his lips just barely dusting his skin in a rather formal greeting. A couple students that weren’t as focused as they should have been giggled softly at Shinji’s fire-red face (who was still too stunned to move), but that break in concentration earned them a punishment from the teacher in the form of having them lead the rest in warm-ups at the front of the studio room.

“Shall we then?” Kaworu suggested, still holding Shinji’s hand as he led the both of them over to where Shinji had originally been practicing.

\---------------------------------------------

By the time rehearsal was done for the day, Shinji wasn’t even sure why he was told to show Kaworu the ropes. If anything, _he_ was the one keeping up with the strange new boy. Kaworu picked up the routine after only watching the group practice it twice, mildly mimicking it off to the sidelines until he was able to join in shortly after. The teacher was beside herself with excitement, this new and obviously talented child having chosen her school. The students could read this easily and groaned in mutual understanding that she had chosen her new favorite.

Shinji couldn’t help the word that formed in his mind when he started carefully watching Kaworu dance when he was sure he wasn’t paying attention.

_Beautiful_.

It was a word that pushed electricity through his heart with his blood, surprised but not disturbed. The way Kaworu stretched for certain moves, the way he nearly seemed as though he was standing in a pool of water that held him in place while on his toes… It was all so graceful.  Shinji could even imagine wings on the boy’s back during the leaps (so effortless as if his will was greater than gravity’s), gliding him back to Earth and landing with hardly a sound.

Even while he danced, Kaworu’s smile hadn’t faded, but the furrow in his brow showed the intensity and heart he put into his movements, as well as his confidence. Shinji exhaled softly, completely enraptured to the point that his instructor called him out and nearly made him do strength exercises to get him to re-focus.

Kaworu was far more incredible than he could ever be.

Shinji didn’t mind, though. He never really saw himself as talented and always managed to just get by without having to do as much as some of the others had to (Asuka was absolutely furious that he didn’t take it as seriously as she did and yet he was able to keep up), but he didn’t mind it.

He wasn’t here for the competition or any sort of “bragging rights,” he was simply there because dancing was an escape from his home. He was there because the bruises on his toes, all the calluses and sometimes painful accidents reminded him he was alive.

It was nice.

“Good work today, everyone! We’ll see you next week!” the instructor dismissed her class, and everyone began trotting off to collect their things and throw their street clothes on over their dance uniforms.

Shinji sighed, shouldering his bag to relocate his stuff to a corner more distanced from the others, not quite in the mood to deal with them right now. He dug through his things, glancing over now and again to notice that Kaworu was welcomed into the fold rather quickly. Not surprising, Shinji thought, as his calm and relaxed demeanor paired with a smile so warm it could melt ice would be an instant hit with most anyone. Shinji finally pulled out his music player from the bag, leaning against the wall and turning to face away from everyone before putting in the headphones, closing his eyes.

He always stayed behind, just a little longer. The instructor knew about his issues with his father and allowed the studio to be open to him for a little longer so he could have some peace to himself, trusting Shinji to make sure the door was locked before he leaves.

He didn’t hear everyone else leave, but he knew by now they should be gone. He sighed softly, pulling his headphones out again and opening his eyes to only be greeted by red crimson looking at him from the wall in front of him. Shinji was so startled he was frozen, staring unblinking at Kaworu before a light blush dusted his face.

He wasn’t smiling. But there was something else there, something so genuine. Shinji couldn’t form a word for it.

“...Um, did you need something, Nagisa…?” Shinji cautiously asked, feeling nervous.

A soft smile finally appeared, different from all the others. “Please, Kaworu is fine. And actually, I was hoping we could talk. Do you mind?” he asked, pushing himself off of the wall to close a bit of the distance between them. Shinji’s eyebrows drew together the slightest, confused as of how he could have possibly gained this person’s interest.

“Uh, sure,” he mumbled, carefully putting his music player back into his backpack.

“Wonderful!” Kaworu replied enthusiastically before taking Shinji’s hand in his own, guiding the now confused boy back towards the center of the dance floor.

“I-I thought you wanted to talk…?” he stutters slightly, face heating from slight embarrassment.

Kaworu nodded. “I do. I wanted to ask you if you would like to work on something together, just the two of us?” he asked, eyes locked onto Shinji’s to search for an answer.

Shinji’s mind halted, completely taken aback. With him?

“It’s fine, I mean…” Shinji started to backpedal. “Do you really want to do that? I’m not that good, I mean if you want someone to work with…”

Kaworu shook his head, a small laugh escaping him. “You seem to doubt your own ability. Is there a reason for that?”

Shinji frowned, biting his lower lip. “N-no, I’m just being honest. There are people here that are a lot better than I am.”

Kaworu sighed a little, a sad smile on his face. “Ikari--”

“Um, you can call me Shinji… It’s okay,” Shinji interrupted, fidgeting with his fingers nervously.

The sad smile on Kaworu’s face warmed up the slightest. “Shinji. You know our teacher didn’t pick you out to work with me on a whim, right? I asked her if I could work with you,” he said softly.

Shinji started at him dumbly, not processing what he was just told. What?

Kaworu laughed somewhat awkwardly, and Shinji could have sworn he saw the boy blush the slightest bit. He didn’t know why he was surprised by that--maybe he felt Kaworu was the kind of person that was always composed. But…

Wasn’t he always smiling before? Didn’t he stop after everyone had left and was only here with him? Shinji realized that maybe he was seeing something that Kaworu doesn’t let just anyone see.

...So this is important to him. Okay.

“...I just felt inexplicably drawn to the way you held yourself. You dance very well, but you seem… Closed off, like you’re scared perhaps,” Kaworu starts talking, walking slowly around Shinji  before pressing his hand softly against the center of his back.

Shinji’s eyes widen in surprise, but before he can say anything Kaworu uses one of his feet to slide one of Shinji’s, the boy now realizing that Kaworu was guiding him into a dance position. He exhaled a little puff of air after finally putting the pieces together, allowing himself to move into the step that Kaworu had started guiding him to.

“Ah, see,” he says softly, almost as though he was confirming it to himself. “The way you have your arms… They’re close, as though you’re afraid to let yourself go,” he murmurs, stepping forward again.

Shinji can feel Kaworu’s hand slide under his arm and he freezes as the boy guides his arm and hand with his own, opening up his posture just a bit more. Kaworu peeks over his shoulder, his chest pressed against his back and face close enough that his hair tickled Shinji’s cheek before he felt him nod a bit.

“...Just like that, hold that,” he says warmly before stepping away to appraise his posture.

Shinji was more amazed he was holding so still for the fact his heart was about to leap out of his chest, rather than at his new given posture.

It continued like this for a bit, Kaworu softly guiding Shinji in the steps that he had already practiced so many times. Shinji felt a bit disheartened for a moment in his ability, as Kaworu had only just joined and he was already working on improving where Shinji was apparently lacking.

But he only really, truly noticed the difference it made when Kaworu was starting to do the movements and steps with him.

They started moving through the routine, no longer step-by-step. Shinji felt more fluid, almost lighter, remembering the small corrections and changes Kaworu gave him. His heart started pounding when he finally looked in the mirror and saw them dancing together--and seeing that he was moving with just as much ease as Kaworu was behind him.

“Keep going,” Kaworu murmured to Shinji, and he obliged without a thought while Kaworu moved to stand in front of Shinji instead.

After pausing a moment, Kaworu finally jumped back in, but with different steps. Shinji threw Kaworu a look of confusion, but Kaworu shook his head, all the while dancing with him.

“Keep going,” he insisted with a determined smile.

It felt odd at first, but as they both moved around each other Shinji started to notice how it was falling together. When he made a step, Kaworu was able to compliment it with one of his own, fitting together in a whole new routine. Shinji wasn’t even watching the mirror anymore and his eyes were following Kaworu’s, breathlessly falling into tempo and movement as they worked with each other. Kaworu would reach for Shinji occasionally, and in an instinctual reaction he would reach out in return, allowing them both to move in such a way that was outside of the routine altogether.

It was like riding on wind, winding but graceful as they stepped together, Kaworu sometimes even taking Shinji’s hands and guiding them to his hips before leaping. Shinji would spin, holding onto the energy that Kaworu gave as they both lost themselves in music that wasn’t there for anyone else to hear, sliding back down in his hold before bending together. Shinji didn’t know where this was all coming from, but the liberation was so incredible he never wanted to stop, even after his muscles began to ache from the strain of the constant movement of dance.

In fact, by the time they had finally stopped, Kaworu with his eyes closed and smile beaming as he was held in the air by Shinji, holding a graceful arch... he wasn’t even sure of how or when they got to be that way. The were both out of breath, exhausted but at the same time brimming with energy, and as Shinji carefully lowered Kaworu back to the ground he couldn’t help but smile back at the boy’s genuine grin.

“...We’re amazing together,” Kaworu breathed with certainty, resting his hands on Shinji’s shoulders. “Let’s work together from now on. Would that be okay?” he asks again, nervous excitement brimming in his voice from being unable to contain himself after their dance.

For the first time since he could remember, Shinji felt excited. More than just “alive,” and he felt that maybe, just maybe…

He could easily get used to this. To him.

Shinji rested his hands on Kaworu’s shoulders as well, allowing himself to smile at him before laughing the softest. He closed his eyes and bumped his forehead against Kaworu’s softly.

“...Yeah. Thank you.”

“The pleasure is mine,” Kaworu replied cheerfully, closing his eyes as well with a peaceful grin.

It was the first time Shinji Ikari left the studio without blocking out the world with his music player, and one of the reasons he would never forget the first day Kaworu Nagisa arrived to their dance school.

And when the both of them left the studio together that day, they did so hand in hand.

 


End file.
